The Barf came alive the first time ever when some teenagers ate a really bad burger that had been left around way too long. I mean this burger had mushrooms growing on the top bun and all of the meat was growing hair from being so old and gross.
The teenagers all ate the burger on a dare and then they got really, really sick. They barfed a little bit at first, but then they barfed more and more every day for an hour!
The Barf wasn't normal barf, it got together and made one big barf that was ALIVE. It started to move around and boy was that so gross!
The Barf moved all over the place. It went around houses and up hills and across the street. Even if cars were coming. It didn't care because it could come back together even if it got hit by cars!!
The Barf got so gross because it picked up dirt and garbage. It was so gross that everyone who looked at it barfed, too, and all of that barf became part of The Barf!! It got bigger and bigger and grosser and grosser until the Government decided to do something to stop The Barf.
Television talked about The Barf all the time, and every time they showed video if it, more people would barf in their houses and the barf would go off really quick to become part of The Barf. Nobody could catch it first.
Some scientists got hired to create a No-Barf gun and then some strong guys built it all up. It was really hard because the scientists were German and the strong guys were normal American! Eventually it worked though and all of the gun pieces got put together right.
The scientists shot the No-Barf gun at The Barf over three times, but it didn't do anything at all! The Barf didn't notice anything was even shot at it, but some teenagers near The Barf got fried by how hot the shots were.
They weren't the same teenagers from the beginning.
Eventually The Barf got to a really tall skyscraper and started to go up its side like King Kong. The Barf probably didn't see that movie, it was just a coincidence. The Barf kept slowly climbing the building and every time it got to an office window, everyone working in the offices started to BARF!! All kinds of businessmen and paper filing workers got so sick all over the entire offices.
Someone's Mom worked there and she was on the phone with her kids when she started barfing. Her kids barfed when they heard it, and some of the barf even got onto the phone's numbers that someone else would have to press later on.
There was one guy whose stomach was so good that he never barfed, even when looking at The Barf. His name was "Guts" Steel and his parents knew he was so tough because they named him that when he was a baby.
"Guts" Steel knew that The Barf was very powerful, but also it didn't have a real brain like people or animals. It didn't have a brain in any way really. So he figured out that The Barf wouldn't know the difference between real barf and plastic barf you can buy at prank stores.
He climbed the building and when he was at the top, he just emptied like a ton of boxes of fake barf onto The Barf. It didn't know the barf was made up so The Barf started adding the plastic to itself.
Eventually The Barf hardened all up like plastic. All of it! "Guts" Steel took a grenade out of his shirt pocket, then, and threw it down at The Barf!
The Barf said one thing before it exploded because of the grenade.
It said, "I AM THE BARF. I AM EVERYWHERE. RIGHT NOW I AM IN ALL THE STOMACHS OF EVERY PERSON OUT THERE!"
That was the day The Barf started attacking, and now thankfully it's over but everyone is still worried about the final words of The Barf.
Right now… in your stomach…
There's some barf just waiting.